Love Like Winter
by lady-warrioress
Summary: Hiei would never admit his feelings for Botan until an incident makes him realize he really does care about her. But before he can tell her he has to deal with the one trying to kill her. [I suck at summaries. Beter than is sounds] HxB REVIEW PLEASE
1. The Ice Dance

CHAPTER 1 The Ice Dance

The wintry air hit his face as he stepped outside and into the gently falling snow. It was December and the first snow of the season was slowly making it's way out of heaven and to the living world below. Everyone else was asleep for the night but he wanted to spend a little more time outside. The others didn't bother trying to stop him, though they did warn him about frost bite, not that the cold bothered him much anyway. His body could take it. It always had.

Sighing he turned his head upward and let the soft flakes hit his face with soft kisses. It felt nice. For once it felt nice. Snow used to be something he loathed and tried to avoid as much as possible. It was like rain and he hated rain. Snow was just rain anyway, frozen rain. He no longer hated it but he wasn't a fan either. Snow and rain.. would always bring back horrible memories. Memories best left buried under years of penance. It had always been that way.

_You no longer haunt me. You have no control anymore..._ he thought, feeling defiant.

The wind picked up as if disagreeing with him. He let if buffer him a moment, not letting the gales bother him too much. Wind wasn't his friend either but he could stand it. He always could.

_Your heart is as cold as the ice you came from... _a voice in his mind reminded him. _Snow doesn't affect you because you're just as cold as it is. It's a part of you and you're a part of it. Remember that. The cold keeps anyone from loving you. You don't need love anyway. You're better than that..._

He shook his head in disagreement. "I'm not better than that," he said. "I never will be."

_Beware your feelings._ the wind seemed to warn him.

"Who are you to tell me how I should control my feelings?" he demanded. "You are not my father." he glared off into the distance, the snow landing softly in his hair and clothes. "What do you know anyway?"

_She will just ruin your life._

He chose to ignore the words of the wind. "She will not ruin my life," he muttered, thinking about the female the elements were talking about. "She's too afraid of me to do that."

The wind was talking about a certain blue haired grim reaper with captivating pink bubble gum colored eyes. When he'd first met her he'd had absolutely no interest in her but things between them started to develop when Hiei would start getting into her mind to make sure she didn't tell Yukina he was her brother. It had been fun making her squirm and he'd really enjoyed scaring the living daylights out of her. His interest in her matured even more when she proved she was smart enough to convince him to help her and the others find the spirit detective Yusuke when he'd been kidnapped. She's known just what to say to him and he'd agreed almost right away when she held out the right bait. Then later that night he'd had his first but not last form of physical contact with her, when he'd grabbed her hand to stop her from putting a stupid sticker on his cloak. He'd felt a spark of something when he'd touched her and even now he couldn't figure out what it was but when he'd taken her wrist and stared right into her eyes he'd felt something he'd never felt before and just recently he'd come up with a name for it. Attraction.

_You will regret your feelings... _the voice insisted._ Something will happened and you will regret it._

_She doesn't even know how I feel, _he argued back. _How can I regret something she doesn't even know about?_

_Beware your feelings,_ the voice in his mind warned one more time before fading away and leaving Hiei alone in the night. He looked back up into the sky, the snow gently resting on his face once more.

* * *

Botan also couldn't sleep so she'd wrapped a blanket around herself and stepped outside into the wonderland. She smiled in content as she watched the snow fall gently to the ground and onto her cotton candy blue hair. It was a lovely night. Once in awhile the moon would find a break in the thick clouds and cast its light down onto her. She smiled as she looked over the landscape before her. 

Below was a frozen pond. The lake that had frozen over when the weather got cold. Nobody had bothered the lake since. It seemed to be calling to her. Begging her to step onto its frozen surface. The fact that the ice could still be too thin didn't even cross her mind as she stood and, letting the blanket drop onto the ground as she walked slowly toward the pond, as if in a daze.

* * *

Hiei decided to walk around the property for awhile to get his mind off the message in the wind. Before long he came upon the blanket Botan had left lying on the ground. "Huh?" he said, leaning down and picking it up. It was still warn so whoever had been wrapped in it was still around somewhere. He lifted his head and looked around. He wasn't expecting to see anyone but he did. Not too far away he spotted a figure step onto the frozen pond at the bottom of the hill. 

"Who is that?" he asked himself out loud. "and what are they doing out here without a coat on?" he squinted against the falling snow trying to get a better look. After a moment he realized who it was. "Botan? What is that onna doing out in this weather without a coat?"

* * *

Botan's heart filled with music as she stepped onto the ice, ignoring the cold biting into her bear feet. The snow around her didn't even seem real. She felt as if she were in the middle of an ice show. The Nutcracker maybe. She closed her eyes and started to slowly move the to song in her heart.

* * *

Hiei reached the end of the pond and started to call out to Botan. The ice was still too thin for anyone to be on it but when he saw what she was doing he could only watch. She was moving gracefully over the ice as if she were dancing. The snow around her swirled with her movements and didn't seem real. For a moment he forgot about the danger and just watched her. This part of Botan he'd never seen. She seemed as if she was another person. Suddenly he noticed something else moving with her. He blinked but the image wouldn't go away. Bright lights appeared around her. _Souls..._ he thought. _Those are souls dancing with her..._

Indeed they were. As the ferry girl moved gracefully over the ice the souls got brighter and brighter. Soon they moved with her then slowly rose into the sky. Hiei watched in fascination. She was sending souls to heaven without even having to ferry them. He didn't know she could do that.

Just as the moment was getting more magical there was a sickening crack and with a scream Botan disappeared under the ice.

For a moment Hiei stood frozen to hit spot not realizing what had happened. Finally reality hit him and he dashed over the ice then fell onto his stomach and crawled toward her. He saw her thrashing in the water trying to get out of it. Hiei reached her a moment later but couldn't reached her hand. He didn't know what to do. If he couldn't reach her she'd die. Finally he decided on one thing. He slowly slide off the ice and into the water, grabbing her around the waist as soon as he felt his body contract with hers. In her panic she grabbed onto him and almost pulled him under with her. He didn't let her. He swan as best he could back to the thicker part of the ice and heaved her out of the frigid water. She landed a few feet away. He pulled himself out and ran over to her. She sat there shivering. He quickly picked her up and ran off the ice, hearing it crack and break behind him as he ran. Once they were safely on land Hiei put her down and Botan sat on the ground shivering. Hiei watched her a moment then quickly retrieved the blanket and draped it around her.

"Are you all right?" he asked her.

"I-I-I th-think s-so," she managed through chattering teeth. She looked up at him. "W-what a-are y-you d-doing h-here?"

"I was just going for a walk," he said looking away from her. "What are you doing out here? Why were you on the ice? You know it's not thick enough to stand on yet."

Botan looked back at the ice, not cracked in areas. "I-I don't k-know," she answered. "I-I J-just felt I had to..."

Hiei stared. _She had to? _He looked at the ice too. Something didn't seem right all of a sudden.

"I think we should get back to the house," he said, looking back at her. "You might need a doctor or something. Can you walk?"

She stared at him. She'd nearly frozen and drowned in that water and he wanted her to walk?! "No," she answered, holding in her irritation. "I can't. I'm too cold."

He stared at her a moment then reached down and picked her up, blanket and all. He moved quickly back to the house.

"Hiei," Botan said.

"Hn?" he replied, not looking at her.

"Thank you for saving me," she said.

"I just happened to be around," he told her flatly.

_A/N_

_I was listening to a Christmas song (hahah it's April and I'm thinking about Christmas) when I got this idea. Funny. I can't remember what song it was anymore. Anyway, this isn't a Christmas fic it's just a winter fic. I hope you people read it anyway. It was going to be a one shot but when I listened to the song again I got some inspiration and it will be longer. I don't know how much longer but longer. I hope you like it. Let me know what ya think okay? _

_I suggest listening to "My December" "The Ice Dance" or "Eternal Snow" when you read this fic._

_ PLEASE LEAVE A REVIEW! PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE! COULD SOMEONE GIVE ME AT LEAST ONE REVIEW?!  
_


	2. What Were You Doing?

CHAPTER 2 What Were You Doing?

When Hiei arrived back at the house he carried Botan into the living room and set her down on the couch. Then he turned to the fire place and started a toasty fire. "Now," he said when he saw Botan wasn't shivering anymore. "Can you explain to me why you had to dance on the lake when you knew the water wasn't completely frozen yet?"

Botan looked out the window at the still falling snow before she answered. "I just felt like doing it," she replied her voice a little far away sounding. "I heard a voice in my head telling me to, telling me it would be okay. I thought it would be all right. "

"But-," he began.

"It was just so _beautiful," _she cut him off, as if that would explain things better. "I couldn't help myself." she stared off into space for another moment then said. "I always loved winter. It's my favorite season. I guess I just wanted to be part of it."

"By doing a ballet dance on thin ice?" he demanded.

"So you were watching me?" she said looking right at him.

"Of _course_ I was!" he shot back. "I didn't want you to fall in!"

"But I did!" she retorted, feeling angry herself. "You were watching me and you didn't say anything! You didn't bother warning me that the ice was too thin!"

"I thought you _knew!" _he shouted back just as angrily. "I didn't know you were this much of a baka!"

"I am not a baka!" she growled. "I just felt caught up in the moment!"

"What moment?" he said. "the moment before or after you fell through?!"

"Why would I tell you which moment I mean!" she yelled, getting up with the blanket wrapped around her. "Why should I tell you anything!? You just think I'm stupid!"

"You _are_ stupid!" he said before he could stop himself. "You are very stupid! You went dancing on thin ice for goodness sake! With nothing on but a thin night gown! And on top of that you didn't even have any shoes on! Who did you think you were? Yuna?"

Botan glared at him. Why should he care? He didn't even like her. "I'm not Yuna!" she shouted sitting back down, "I just wanted to dance!"

"You keep repeating yourself," he said. "I _know_ you wanted to dance. I know you felt like you had to but why did you feel like you had to? What was it that made you feel that way?"

"I don't know," she said, defensively. "I just did."

He sighed and shook his head. This was getting him nowhere. There had to be a reason. She'd said she'd heard a voice in her head telling her to dance so she'd obeyed it and almost got herself killed. But was the voice even real? Was it just her imagination? Was something or someone else? He wasn't sure he'd ever find out. _But why try to make the ferry onna fall into a frozen lake?_ he wondered. _Why persuade her to go onto the ice? Why? _He looked out at the still falling snow_. Whoever or whatever it was it can probably hide itself easily in this weather. Maybe tomorrow I'll look for it_. It hit him then that he seemed to want to desperately find whatever had been the cause of Botans weird dance. It might be nothing but he wasn't about to let whoever it might be get away... if someone was involved.

Hiei noticed Botan staring at him. "What?" he demanded.

"It's not a big mystery, you know," she said, getting up again. The blanket swished against the floor as she headed for her room. "I was just a little careless, that's all."

Hiei wasn't so sure.

* * *

The next morning Botan seemed to have forgotten about the incident. She was too excited about something they'd planned for the next day. Hiei didn't want to go but the others seemed to like the idea, especially Kuwabara, who thought the idea would be a great way to reviel his love for Yukina, Hiei's sister. 

"Hey," Yusuke said, looking out the front window of the house. "How come the lake is all broken up? Did someone try to do some ice fishing on it or something?"

Hiei and Botan glanced at each other but neither gave any explanations.

"It's probably nothing," Keiko told him, also looking out the window. "the ice wasn't thick enough to skate on anyway."

"Yeah but still," he said. "I was hoping to do some ice fishing when it was thick enough. Now I'm going to have to wait longer."

"All well," Keiko said, going back to the table to finish her breakfast. "That just means you can go on the sleigh ride with us later on."

"I can't wait," he said sarcastically as he followed her back to the table.

"What are you planning on doing today, Hiei-San?" Yukina asked, looking over at her brother.

The Koormine looked at his twin sister and shook his head. "I'm not planning on doing anything," he told her. "I was just going to stay here."

"Why?" Yukina asked.

He didn't have a good enough answer so he said nothing.

"Hey, Hiei," Botan said. "Why _don't_ you go on the sleigh ride with us?" she asked.

"Why would I want to do that, onna?" he questioned, looking right at the ferry girl with annoyance.

"It's better than staying here all day," she replied, shrugging. "I just don't want you to be bored."

"I don't get bored," he informed her.

She sniffed. "Still," she said. "it couldn't hurt."

No, it couldn't hurt but Hiei was never a very social person nor did he like doing things that he thought was pointless. That's why he never played Rich Man Poor Man. A sleight ride was definitely within those lines. Besides a sleigh ride was stupid. Why would anyone want to ride in a sleigh in the middle of winter with cold air blowing in your face? What was the point? It was like the perfect scene for getting frost bite, not that Hiei had ever had any.

"C'mon, Hiei," Botan pressed. "It'll be fun."

"Hn," he said, getting up from the table. "I think I'll pass."

_A/N_

_I am going to keep trying to update this fic and "Nocturne" (Which nobody reviewed when I put up my most recent chapter) as much as possible. Sorry if this chapter was short. I have a slight case of writers block. Just to let you know, they are spending the winter at Genkais' house since she's on vacation. It's kinda like they are house sitting, lol._

_Please be kind enough to leave a review. Thank you. _


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